Feeling Your Emotions in Your Body

Hello And Welcome to December :)

We are in another season of change. This time of year always brings feelings of one last push forward into the final season of the year before I begin looking ahead to the next year. You may find this to be an extra difficult time of the year. Grief can, and often does, accompany change. This season might be highlighting a specific change you have undergone in your life, family, or heart and I want you to know you are not alone in this. I wish you comfort and warmth during this time.

I always tend to feel a panic creep up inside me during December, specifically around running out of time... The Holiday season is a favorite of mine. I love giving and receiving gifts, spending time with my family, singing carols in the car to Classy 97's Christmas channel, and watching uplifting holiday movies. Every year I try to find a balance between not pushing too many things onto the agenda and enjoy slowing down with the rest of the natural world around me. However, there is an internal pull towards fear. Fear of not enjoying the season, not getting all the joy I possibly can, and not doing enough. This accompanies the anxiety of starting into a new year. I find myself saying "what it is over already, I didn't get half of the things done that I wanted to". Cue more feelings of anxiety and fear about running out of time as January 1st sneaks closer and closer.

I think one of the more powerful things I have learned through yoga and mindfulness is the ability to recognize these feelings at all. Past years have brought around similar emotions without the clarity and understanding to recognize them for what they are (signals). I would end up allowing my anxiety to take over in different ways like over shopping/spending, over scheduling myself, and having an overhanging dread everyday of December. I would inevitably become sick and December would wind down along with my energy and health. Learning about the connection between the body and the mind I can now see how obvious these chain of reactions were. My body was trying to signal me to slow down, to pause and notice what I am feeling. This would allow me to ask and understand why I had those feelings in the first place and seek to understand them. Instead, they took over and I lost my opportunity to recognize what was happening through numbing and avoidance.

Our bodies store and hold the emotions we feel every second, every day. A fun way to experiment with this phenomenon is to think of a situation where you felt and intense emotion and see if you then feel a physical response. If you are up for it, lets try it out. (remember if your emotions become to strong you are allowed to stop reading at anytime)

You might think of a situation where you felt ashamed. You might even choose to close your eyes and imagine where you were, what was going on, who was there, and allow yourself to temporarily step back into that moment. What do you feel? Now Where do you feel it? I feel shame as a hot acid rising in the back of my throat, a sinking sick feeling in my stomach, and the intense urge to make my body as small as possible. If the shame is especially strong I may begin to feel hot in my checks, and a prickling of tears forming at the outer corners of my eyes.

You might take some time to recognize where you are feeling your emotions of shame in your body? Always leaving open the possibility of not feeling it anywhere. You can do this experiment with any emotion joy, sadness, excitement, fear, etc. This ability is a skill meaning it can be learned and practiced overtime. Why would you want to have this information? Well it gives you another channel where information can come through and be heard. Information which can be used to inform your actions, decisions, and understanding of a situation.

When I am starting to get the urge to add another item onto the holiday calendar to-do list, I can now check in with myself. Am I doing this out of fear and anxiety around the year ending, or is this an activity I actively want to do with my time? You can begin to ask yourself this same type of question. Am I on my phone because I want to connect with others, or am I avoiding and numbing something else happening in my life? Do I want to engage in conversation with my partner about a grievance right now or do I feel anger which makes me feel justified to yell at them? A quick body scan is all you need. Be curious about what you might be feeling in the moment and stop to check in with your body. I usually accompany this with closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, but you can find a technique for you and your body. I invite you to take this next week and do some body scans. Check in and pay attention to yourself. You are worth it!

If you want to practice body scans more this week feel free to come to class where we will be developing this skill more. I hope all is well in your world and if not I hope you have the courage to seek the help, comfort, and love you need.

All my love to you during this winter season,

-Janae

p.s. If you enjoyed learning about body scans and feel it might be helpful for someone else in your life, feel free to share this with them. It helps to spread the word and get more people connecting with themselves and their emotions which equals a more connected society in my opinion. :)